What Do You Want?

    It has been said that a kind word turns away wrath and harsh words stir up strife (Proverbs 15:1).  What do we do then when faced with a situation in which we are hurt and offended? Be kind and forgive or be mean and cause more strife? This leads to a more important question. How do we want to be known, which action do we want to persevere?

    It has been my experience that when I have been hurt and in anger, hurt the person back, more strife has been caused.  A bigger argument ensued, and the relationship was much harder to repair, if repaired at all.  The strife persevered. However, in situations in which I have done the opposite and spoke kindly and forgiven it has turned out much more positively. Peace has persevered and the relationship remained intact.   Kindness and forgiveness stops strife and ends the argument. 

                    I am not perfect in this, nor will I ever be.  I am going to struggle.  I do struggle.  Especially the kind words, I would much rather spew my anger at the person who hurt me.  That is much easier than confronting my feelings in my own heart, sorting thru it in my own mind. Why?  When I am kind and forgive, I see my own faults and shortcomings in the situation.  A relationship is a two way street.  I have to look at myself as well who hurt me.  Then I grow, and the love of Christ shines more in me.

     Now, I write understanding fully that sometimes forgiveness needs to occur but the relationship cannot, nor should it, be repaired.   Examples would be abusive or unhealthy relationships.   Let’s face it.  Some people are not healthy and like to live life in constant strife and upheaval. I think in those cases it is ok to be kind to them and forgive when hurt but not maintain relationship or have very strict boundaries in place.   In extreme cases such as these, forgiveness doesn’t have or need to be a verbal conversation. You can write a letter that you will never send, say it in a prayer to God or talk it over with a pastor or therapist. In these special circumstances wisdom must be sought and used.

   One final thought.  What do you want to persevere?  As I thought this over the last few days, I know what I want. I want kindness and forgiveness to persevere.    Not so people can think I am such a great person. No. I want kindness and forgiveness to persevere so people can know Jesus and experience HIS forgiveness. 


May 27, 2014. Tags: , , , , . Uncategorized. 2 comments.